i'm no longer a good blogger or nope.. i never be a good blogger ... or so i never be a real blogger .. i just blog for myself ... zzzzz....
well, how sad .. November 2011 just passed without any memories in the blog tho .
but then , i can said NOVEMBER 2011 is the most meaningful month of the year 2011 . YES !! i ASSUMED and AGREED it is.
in the month, where i spent all the $$ in the month and that mean dec'2011 i'm gonna be so broke.. but thanks god. God always answered more than i asked i'm sooooo thankful.
finally Dec'2011 , the lil crib is done and we moved. it's gonna be a memorable month . i left the home where i stay for 16yrs, i left mum & dad where i stick to them for more than 30yrs. and NO .. i haven't marry yet .. as mostly all the $ spent on the crib , hence ... we have to postpone it.
but then , i felt homesick ... so horrible homesick when i moved.
for the 2nd day i moved i called mum and told her i miss her .. then i cry out loud, then while we going bck and packing i cried, when i saw dad and gave him a hug and i cried, then i hug mum and i cried again ... thy laughed on me said i'm lousy but mind you ?? that's my parents tho. i'm surely miss them ... never take things for granted. i can bet most of you never hug your parent right ?? for one day u didnt do so , u gonna regret then .
till then , i'm still learning how to manage a place where we called it home.. hence really lots i got to learn , but we had great daily routine wakeup at morning , having homemade breakkie, do some house work before leave for works.
hope, i got to learn more and hope toi got to help more :)
all i want to say is thank you & i love you to anyone of you , toi , mum, dad, angels ard me and god.
thank you.
Showing posts with label De' Foundz. Show all posts
Showing posts with label De' Foundz. Show all posts
Thursday, December 8, 2011
Sunday, September 25, 2011
~* words *~
sometimes i apologize doesn't mean i'm wrong and you are right...
it just means i value the friendship more than my ego.
if your ego does worth so much, it just meaning all your friendship is worth so less... go and have fun with your little world ..
May all your life filled with lots of your EGO.
kthxbai
Thursday, August 11, 2011
~* TEST*~
a TEST i found ....
and i personal felt its kinda accurate ...
Five things are happening in your house at the same time. In which sequence would you solve them?
and i personal felt its kinda accurate ...
Five things are happening in your house at the same time. In which sequence would you solve them?
1. The telephone is ringing!
2. The baby is crying!
3. Someone's knocking or calling you from the front door
4. You hung the clothes out to dry and it is beginning to rain!
5. You left the tap on in the kitchen and the water is already overflowing!
First write YOUR sequence from 1 to 5 then scroll below and read after:
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
Answer:
Every individual point represents something in your life.
On the list you can see which meaning every point has:
1. Telephone represents Work
2. Baby represents Family
3. Door represents Friends
4. Clothes represent Money
5. Tap represents Love Life
Your chosen sequence determines the priorities in your life.
mine goes with - baby , tap, door, phone, cloths
you ???? ; )
2. The baby is crying!
3. Someone's knocking or calling you from the front door
4. You hung the clothes out to dry and it is beginning to rain!
5. You left the tap on in the kitchen and the water is already overflowing!
In which sequence would you solve these problems? Write the sequence and check below how your decisions were made.
BUT BE HONEST, THE FINDINGS ARE EXCITING.
First write YOUR sequence from 1 to 5 then scroll below and read after:
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
*
Answer:
Every individual point represents something in your life.
On the list you can see which meaning every point has:
1. Telephone represents Work
2. Baby represents Family
3. Door represents Friends
4. Clothes represent Money
5. Tap represents Love Life
Your chosen sequence determines the priorities in your life.
mine goes with - baby , tap, door, phone, cloths
you ???? ; )
Thursday, August 4, 2011
~* the articles found @ 2006 *~
found a post sharing in year 2006 via my old blog ... so worth to have a look ; )
it's time i'm thinking how should i sharpen my axe ; )
~Once upon a time, there was a very strong man. He asked for a job from
a timber merchant, and he got it. The pay was really good and so were
the work conditions. For that reason, the man was determined to do his
best. His boss gave him an axe and showed him the area where he is
supposed to work. The first day, he brought down 18 trees. The Boss was
very much impressed and said, "Congratulations Go on that way! Very
motivated by the words of the boss, he tried harder the next day, but
only could bring down 15 trees. The third day he tried even harder, but
he could only bring down 10 trees. Day after day he was bringing down
less and less trees. "I must be losing my strength", he thought to
himself. He went to the Boss and apologized, saying that he could not
understand what was going on. "When was the last time you sharpened
your axe?" the boss asked. "Sharpen? I had no time to sharpen my axe. I
have been busy cutting trees.
The moral of this story:Our lives are like that. We sometimes get so busy that we don't take
time to sharpen the axe. In today's world, it seems that everyone is
busier than ever, but less happy than ever. Why is that? Could it be
that we have forgotten how to stay sharp? There's nothing wrong with
activity and hard work. But we should not get so busy and neglect the
truly important things in life, like our personal life, taking time to
care for others, Taking time to read etc. We all need time to relax, to
think and meditate, to learn and grow. If you don't take the time to
sharpen the axe, we will become dull and lose our effectiveness. So,
start from today, think about the ways by which you could do your job
more effectively and add a lot of value to it. Hope this story has given
you some insight to life, may you be happy always!
"TO HANDLE YOURSELF, USE YOUR HEAD.
TO HANDLE OTHERS, USE YOUR HEART"
it's time i'm thinking how should i sharpen my axe ; )
~Once upon a time, there was a very strong man. He asked for a job from
a timber merchant, and he got it. The pay was really good and so were
the work conditions. For that reason, the man was determined to do his
best. His boss gave him an axe and showed him the area where he is
supposed to work. The first day, he brought down 18 trees. The Boss was
very much impressed and said, "Congratulations Go on that way! Very
motivated by the words of the boss, he tried harder the next day, but
only could bring down 15 trees. The third day he tried even harder, but
he could only bring down 10 trees. Day after day he was bringing down
less and less trees. "I must be losing my strength", he thought to
himself. He went to the Boss and apologized, saying that he could not
understand what was going on. "When was the last time you sharpened
your axe?" the boss asked. "Sharpen? I had no time to sharpen my axe. I
have been busy cutting trees.
The moral of this story:Our lives are like that. We sometimes get so busy that we don't take
time to sharpen the axe. In today's world, it seems that everyone is
busier than ever, but less happy than ever. Why is that? Could it be
that we have forgotten how to stay sharp? There's nothing wrong with
activity and hard work. But we should not get so busy and neglect the
truly important things in life, like our personal life, taking time to
care for others, Taking time to read etc. We all need time to relax, to
think and meditate, to learn and grow. If you don't take the time to
sharpen the axe, we will become dull and lose our effectiveness. So,
start from today, think about the ways by which you could do your job
more effectively and add a lot of value to it. Hope this story has given
you some insight to life, may you be happy always!
"TO HANDLE YOURSELF, USE YOUR HEAD.
TO HANDLE OTHERS, USE YOUR HEART"
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
~* Lulamae @ 2008 & 2009 ... *~
Been go thru my old blog today while i'm free during the beginning of month ...
i missed my old blog soooo muchhh !!!!
i'd close it only for invited reader for some reason ..
well ... i do really miss it..
i been blogged lots during that period of time ..
and i got some comments for some post ..
which this new blog don't have.
=.=
when i go through some posts , suddenly i don't like it that much ..
as it's mostly sound so sad and sick.
my life ... how can i go through my life which is so sad and sick ??
perhaps that's the rough life i had go thru to make the present me .
the happy present me i assumed.
those posts and photos had bring backs lots memories for me
which i shall be thankful that i'm still here.
i missed my old blog soooo muchhh !!!!
i'd close it only for invited reader for some reason ..
well ... i do really miss it..
i been blogged lots during that period of time ..
and i got some comments for some post ..
which this new blog don't have.
=.=
when i go through some posts , suddenly i don't like it that much ..
as it's mostly sound so sad and sick.
my life ... how can i go through my life which is so sad and sick ??
perhaps that's the rough life i had go thru to make the present me .
the happy present me i assumed.
those posts and photos had bring backs lots memories for me
which i shall be thankful that i'm still here.
26. 06. 2008
looking at this photo always make me ; )
BALI with the gang wait for the sunrise ...
my GOD !!!!! i missed BALI !!!!!!
my GOD !!!!! i missed BALI !!!!!!
photo in the airport is fun too !!!!
22.06.2008
i didn't actually punch her k ???
;D
this fella is getting slimmer ...
*congratez !! *
24.08.2008
girl talks !!! hard to do so nowadays ...
not even yam cha ..
hmmm =='
girl talks !!! hard to do so nowadays ...
not even yam cha ..
hmmm =='
september 2008 @ club med
awwwwww.... i missed BEACH !!!! i missed being TANNED !!!!
24.10.2008
it's the day ...
the day @ melacca with the angmoh ...
the day i missed you ..
the day @ melacca with the angmoh ...
the day i missed you ..
25. 12. 2008
the dearies ...
10.02.2009
the cny ...
22.03.2009
the days with A.M.Y !!!!! or so-called P.A.Y !!!!!
urghhhhh ..... missed those daysss....
and last but not least
it marked something ...
urghhhhh ..... missed those daysss....
and last but not least
it marked something ...
28.08.2008
i assumed ; )
till then ....
ByE ..
p/s: whoever wanna have a looks on my old blog... do sent me a request then ; ) i'll grant your wish ... teeeheee ...
i assumed ; )
till then ....
ByE ..
p/s: whoever wanna have a looks on my old blog... do sent me a request then ; ) i'll grant your wish ... teeeheee ...
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
~* 沉思 ... *~
又是一个月．．．
七月．．．
你过得好吗？？
不好．．．
你开心吗？？
不开心．．．
你的错吗？？
是吗？？
人不为己，天诛地灭... 是真的吗？？？
自私自利... 是对的吗 ???
做末要借题发挥呢？？？
真的是 TMD !!!!!
七月．．．
你过得好吗？？
不好．．．
你开心吗？？
不开心．．．
你的错吗？？
是吗？？
人不为己，天诛地灭... 是真的吗？？？
自私自利... 是对的吗 ???
做末要借题发挥呢？？？
真的是 TMD !!!!!
Sunday, July 10, 2011
~* 09072011 *~
a day to remember ..
09072011 ...
today onwards, i gotta educate my kids, my friends and even my parents never go for the news from so-called TV/newspaper, GOOGLE it instead !!! its soooo untrue from our local so-called media TV news and NEWSPAPER tho !!!!!
don't get fool peeps !!!!!
do shares this either in your FB, twitter or blog ...
this video had touched my heart ... do you ???
1 malaysia shouldn't be a slogan like those allbullshit campaign our lovely government keep mentioned about ..
i saw 1 malaysia has united in this rally .. so does this so-called "illegal" rally is real "illegal" ??
the things is ..
- this "illegal" rally can be just a "REAL , CLEAN " rally when the government/police didn't set the rally as "illegal"
- it's for sure can be a SAFE and PEACE rally when the police/FRU didn't point the cannon water/tear guns to the protester tho.
and plsssssssss.... please do spread the news to those who are still been fool by those "newspaper" see the truth .. judge yourself ...
last but not least ...
have you REGISTER yourself yet as VOTER ??????
please do sooooo ... you got the duty to VOTE for a CLEAN and better M'sia tho.
09072011 ...
today onwards, i gotta educate my kids, my friends and even my parents never go for the news from so-called TV/newspaper, GOOGLE it instead !!! its soooo untrue from our local so-called media TV news and NEWSPAPER tho !!!!!
don't get fool peeps !!!!!
do shares this either in your FB, twitter or blog ...
this video had touched my heart ... do you ???
1 malaysia shouldn't be a slogan like those all
i saw 1 malaysia has united in this rally .. so does this so-called "illegal" rally is real "illegal" ??
the things is ..
- this "illegal" rally can be just a "REAL , CLEAN " rally when the government/police didn't set the rally as "illegal"
- it's for sure can be a SAFE and PEACE rally when the police/FRU didn't point the cannon water/tear guns to the protester tho.
and plsssssssss.... please do spread the news to those who are still been fool by those "newspaper" see the truth .. judge yourself ...
last but not least ...
have you REGISTER yourself yet as VOTER ??????
please do sooooo ... you got the duty to VOTE for a CLEAN and better M'sia tho.
Friday, June 3, 2011
~* prayer ... *~
i used to do a lil prayer every night before i sleep when i can ..
it's like a daily routine for me for quite sometimes ..
i sense the different to be true ..
and i used to be thankful and grateful every morning when i'm
awake in good health or even i'm not enough sleep .. still i'm grateful for it.
and today ...
i did a lil prayer once i step in my shop ...
i prayed for how i'm gonna make the biz much more well ..
it's like a daily routine for me for quite sometimes ..
i sense the different to be true ..
and i used to be thankful and grateful every morning when i'm
awake in good health or even i'm not enough sleep .. still i'm grateful for it.
and today ...
i did a lil prayer once i step in my shop ...
i prayed for how i'm gonna make the biz much more well ..
so i prayed ..
and
i felt the miracles ... ^.^
i met a girl today ...
i don't know why and my heart keep whispering ..
" does she is the answer angel send for me for my prayer ??? "
every words she talked about seem like
just answering all my Question/prayer tho.
it's soooooo unbelievable ..
and my heart is keep beeping after she left ..
that's sooooooooooooooooooooooo MYSTERY !!!!!
i told toi .. and he said it's a trick ..
==' so i failed ?? or i shall give it a try ??
hmmm....
Tuesday, May 10, 2011
~* 爱情 *~
试问．．． 哪个女人不要那样的求婚．．．
试问．．． 哪个女人不爱那样的婚礼．．．
试问．．． 哪对恋人在真正的讲了句＂我愿意＂以后真的会把诺言守护着呢？？？
黑人说：＂ 把你正式娶回家是我这十年以来每天都在做的梦．． 谢谢你让我美梦成真．．． ＂
．．． 多美丽的爱的宣言．．．
．．． 范范也写得真好．．．
＂你是我最重要的决定，我愿意，每天在你身边苏醒，就连吵架也很过隐， 因为爱情没有输赢， 只有亲密，
你是我最重要的决定， 打破未知的恐惧， 就算流泪也能放晴， 将心比心， 因为爱情没有捷径， 只有经营．．． ＂
every vows are easy to made, how many does keep the vows ????
爱情应该本来就很美丽， 只要＂将心比心，用心经营＂每段爱情也都会有结果．．
请不要忘记, 当你说了" 我愿意" .... 请对自己和她/他负债任 .... ;D
试问．．． 哪个女人不爱那样的婚礼．．．
试问．．． 哪对恋人在真正的讲了句＂我愿意＂以后真的会把诺言守护着呢？？？
黑人说：＂ 把你正式娶回家是我这十年以来每天都在做的梦．． 谢谢你让我美梦成真．．． ＂
．．． 多美丽的爱的宣言．．．
．．． 范范也写得真好．．．
＂你是我最重要的决定，我愿意，每天在你身边苏醒，就连吵架也很过隐， 因为爱情没有输赢， 只有亲密，
你是我最重要的决定， 打破未知的恐惧， 就算流泪也能放晴， 将心比心， 因为爱情没有捷径， 只有经营．．． ＂
every vows are easy to made, how many does keep the vows ????
爱情应该本来就很美丽， 只要＂将心比心，用心经营＂每段爱情也都会有结果．．
请不要忘记, 当你说了" 我愿意" .... 请对自己和她/他负债任 .... ;D
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
~* 120810 *~
a number that i'll NEVER and EVER to forget ..
NEVER !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i'm jotting down for a reminder by myself..
i'm darn so FUCKING FAILED !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i can't go through it ... i really CAN'T !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
dear guardian angel ...
i did lots of prayer ... but why can't you please grant my wish ????
why can't you lead me for letting it go ???
why ??????
why must you lie to me ??
WHY ?????????
i'm seriously don't know how to go through it ... please guide me ...
for the first time i'd to run out of gorgeous just that i don't want it to have all the negative energy which while i'd put lot of positive energy in it ...
bless me ... please ....
NEVER !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i'm jotting down for a reminder by myself..
i'm darn so FUCKING FAILED !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i can't go through it ... i really CAN'T !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
dear guardian angel ...
i did lots of prayer ... but why can't you please grant my wish ????
why can't you lead me for letting it go ???
why ??????
why must you lie to me ??
WHY ?????????
i'm seriously don't know how to go through it ... please guide me ...
for the first time i'd to run out of gorgeous just that i don't want it to have all the negative energy which while i'd put lot of positive energy in it ...
bless me ... please ....
Friday, November 26, 2010
~* 最后一天... *~
时间： 放工后．．．
地点: 明天起将不会再是我工作的位子上．．． 至少明年起，我不会再在这出现．．
心情： 兴奋．．． *不解*
--------------------------------------------------------------
在离开这我工作了１０年有多的地方前， 我想好好的为自己写篇＂东东＂ ．
我知道这些＂东东＂ 一向来都是我尽量的不去面对又不说的事．
很开心．．． 为自己拍拍手 ． *拍拍．．*
很纳闷．．． 对于所谓的＂家人＂
很无奈．．． 谁叫我生出来就是张＂坏脾气＂脸， 而我又无法像她人可以＂假惺惺＂的以不一样的脸来对不一样的人．．．
我承认我失败．．．
在我工作了整１０年的地方里，我做的都不是人教的， 我学的都是自学的．． 或许我真的做错了．． 但是，我从来都不给予改变的机会， 原因？？？ 所有人都说（认定的说） 我不会变．．．对于我最在乎的家人也是如此的认为．．
事实真是如此吗？？？
如果， 时间可以重来．． 打死我, 我也不会选回这条路 !!!!
我真的只想说,
当你们用你们那可贵的手指着说我错时， 你们凭什么？？？
当你们用你们那可贵的手指着说我有没有想过为何会这样时，
你们又有为自己想想你们又会好到那里去？？？
当你们都说 家族工最好打时... 请记得 ... 当你真的做了你才有资格来告诉我说这份工是否好...
曾经, 我笨的以为就算是家族的工.. 但是, 工是工.. 家是家..
所以, 可以的话我不早退... 上班尽量不迟到.. 就算真的迟.. 我也尽量的做迟些再离开... 从来午餐不外出．． 不要求加薪 . . . 不要求福利... 不要求年假... 早前严重得病到死都不拿病假... 可以做的就算是洗厕所.. 当小弟... 什么我都做... 因为... 这是所谓的家族的工...
但是, 我错了..... 我错得超级夸张....
原来,家族的工.. 可以迟上班 不内疚... 可以2个小时午餐... 可以提早离开没关系... 原因??? 因为不爽??? 还是太爽呢??? 我真的超级太佩服了 ！！！这种人晚上, 他们可睡得稳??? 出粮时, $ 可拿得安心呢??? 或许... 他们都会吧 ... 我只能说, 呆在这里10年了... 可能呆得笨了.. 呆得头脑坏了..呆得不够他人做人要 看什么人讲什么话给什么脸... 我的确笨死了... 学的都是张臭脸... 所以, 我承认我很失败....
10年的工... 没功劳也应该有苦劳... 我也从来不奢侈的要求任何的称赞.. 只要不要有做错... 已经是谢天谢地... 但是, 原来家族的生意.. 未工作满一年就可以要求称赞, 更厉害的是就算做错也不可以被纠正.."老板"要自行的修正...
我真的笨啊....
不过, 我真的很感恩 . . . .
我感恩那些让我看清这世界上, 原来不只是做戏才看的到的"戏"子 ....
我感恩那些看不起我的人 . . . .
我感恩那些让我懊恼的人 . . . .
我感恩那些总是说我错的人 . . . .
我感恩那些跟我吵 诅咒我的人 . . . .
我真的很感恩所有发生在我身上的事与我遇见的人 . . . . .
我奢侈的希望, 有那一天, 我也可以像你一样 告诉全世界... 我感恩因为我有"家人"的支持....
很可悲的事. . . 此时此刻 . . . . 我感觉不到. . . .
是我无能. . . .
所以, 我的家人都认为我无能. . . . 我的错 . . . 我的不对 . . ．我应该改 ．．
如果是"家人"的话， 为何我从来没听过是她人的不是, 她人的错, 她人要改呢???
连基本的信任我都感觉不到 ．． 又谈何＂支持＂呢？？？
其实， 我要的东西都很简单．．．
只要相信我已经改了，变了就够了．．． 但是， 谁相信了呢？？
我真的没变吗？？？
这只是一再的重复告诉我 ．．．． 我并不属于这所谓的＂家＂ ．
看到这， 或许还是有人会说我错．．． 没有不互相支持的＂家人＂ 的．．．
我的确希望如此．．． 或许， 会有那天， 我再告诉你．．． 当我感觉到时．．．
最后，
还是那一句．．．． ＂日久见人心＂ 会有一天， 你们会发现．．．． 我是对的.
起码， 我承认我错过．．． 你呢？？？当你可以捂着你的良心过你们互相信任的日子时.... 我会祝福你们.... 要久....
我感恩... 我做了选择.....
我感恩... 你们让我做了选择....
我感恩... 我重生了!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
或许， 新的路不会好走．．．．
但是，路是走出来的．．．
有一天．．．． 小路也会变大道．．．．
我相信！！！！！
至少， 今天过后， 我会是快乐的！！！！ 人因为梦想而伟大．．． 我好伟大啊！！！！ ＾＾＂
ATTRAVERSIAMO !!!!!!!!!!!!!! （ let's cross over !!!!! )
P/: 我说不代表我投诉。。我写我想不代表我坏。。长有张臭脸不代表我不快乐。。我还是感恩的起码我对得起自己，就够了，不是吗？？ *给自己拍拍手＊看开点就没事了。。。
加油！加油！加油!!!!
嘛的，既然没有半点不舍。。
10:10pm
地点: 明天起将不会再是我工作的位子上．．． 至少明年起，我不会再在这出现．．
心情： 兴奋．．． *不解*
--------------------------------------------------------------
在离开这我工作了１０年有多的地方前， 我想好好的为自己写篇＂东东＂ ．
我知道这些＂东东＂ 一向来都是我尽量的不去面对又不说的事．
很开心．．． 为自己拍拍手 ． *拍拍．．*
很纳闷．．． 对于所谓的＂家人＂
很无奈．．． 谁叫我生出来就是张＂坏脾气＂脸， 而我又无法像她人可以＂假惺惺＂的以不一样的脸来对不一样的人．．．
我承认我失败．．．
在我工作了整１０年的地方里，我做的都不是人教的， 我学的都是自学的．． 或许我真的做错了．． 但是，我从来都不给予改变的机会， 原因？？？ 所有人都说（认定的说） 我不会变．．．对于我最在乎的家人也是如此的认为．．
事实真是如此吗？？？
如果， 时间可以重来．． 打死我, 我也不会选回这条路 !!!!
我真的只想说,
当你们用你们那可贵的手指着说我错时， 你们凭什么？？？
当你们用你们那可贵的手指着说我有没有想过为何会这样时，
你们又有为自己想想你们又会好到那里去？？？
当你们都说 家族工最好打时... 请记得 ... 当你真的做了你才有资格来告诉我说这份工是否好...
曾经, 我笨的以为就算是家族的工.. 但是, 工是工.. 家是家..
所以, 可以的话我不早退... 上班尽量不迟到.. 就算真的迟.. 我也尽量的做迟些再离开... 从来午餐不外出．． 不要求加薪 . . . 不要求福利... 不要求年假... 早前严重得病到死都不拿病假... 可以做的就算是洗厕所.. 当小弟... 什么我都做... 因为... 这是所谓的家族的工...
但是, 我错了..... 我错得超级夸张....
原来,家族的工.. 可以迟上班 不内疚... 可以2个小时午餐... 可以提早离开没关系... 原因??? 因为不爽??? 还是太爽呢??? 我真的超级太佩服了 ！！！这种人晚上, 他们可睡得稳??? 出粮时, $ 可拿得安心呢??? 或许... 他们都会吧 ... 我只能说, 呆在这里10年了... 可能呆得笨了.. 呆得头脑坏了..呆得不够他人做人要 看什么人讲什么话给什么脸... 我的确笨死了... 学的都是张臭脸... 所以, 我承认我很失败....
10年的工... 没功劳也应该有苦劳... 我也从来不奢侈的要求任何的称赞.. 只要不要有做错... 已经是谢天谢地... 但是, 原来家族的生意.. 未工作满一年就可以要求称赞, 更厉害的是就算做错也不可以被纠正.."老板"要自行的修正...
我真的笨啊....
不过, 我真的很感恩 . . . .
我感恩那些让我看清这世界上, 原来不只是做戏才看的到的"戏"子 ....
我感恩那些看不起我的人 . . . .
我感恩那些让我懊恼的人 . . . .
我感恩那些总是说我错的人 . . . .
我感恩那些跟我吵
我真的很感恩所有发生在我身上的事与我遇见的人 . . . . .
我奢侈的希望, 有那一天, 我也可以像你一样 告诉全世界... 我感恩因为我有"家人"的支持....
很可悲的事. . . 此时此刻 . . . . 我感觉不到. . . .
是我无能. . . .
所以, 我的家人都认为我无能. . . . 我的错 . . . 我的不对 . . ．我应该改 ．．
如果是"家人"的话， 为何我从来没听过是她人的不是, 她人的错, 她人要改呢???
连基本的信任我都感觉不到 ．． 又谈何＂支持＂呢？？？
其实， 我要的东西都很简单．．．
只要相信我已经改了，变了就够了．．． 但是， 谁相信了呢？？
我真的没变吗？？？
这只是一再的重复告诉我 ．．．． 我并不属于这所谓的＂家＂ ．
看到这， 或许还是有人会说我错．．． 没有不互相支持的＂家人＂ 的．．．
我的确希望如此．．． 或许， 会有那天， 我再告诉你．．． 当我感觉到时．．．
最后，
还是那一句．．．． ＂日久见人心＂ 会有一天， 你们会发现．．．． 我是对的.
起码， 我承认我错过．．． 你呢？？？当你可以捂着你的良心过你们互相信任的日子时.... 我会祝福你们.... 要久....
我感恩... 我做了选择.....
我感恩... 你们让我做了选择....
我感恩... 我重生了!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
或许， 新的路不会好走．．．．
但是，路是走出来的．．．
有一天．．．． 小路也会变大道．．．．
我相信！！！！！
至少， 今天过后， 我会是快乐的！！！！ 人因为梦想而伟大．．． 我好伟大啊！！！！ ＾＾＂
ATTRAVERSIAMO !!!!!!!!!!!!!! （ let's cross over !!!!! )
P/: 我说不代表我投诉。。我写我想不代表我坏。。长有张臭脸不代表我不快乐。。我还是感恩的起码我对得起自己，就够了，不是吗？？ *给自己拍拍手＊看开点就没事了。。。
加油！加油！加油!!!!
嘛的，既然没有半点不舍。。
10:10pm
Sunday, November 21, 2010
~* 1st trial *~
1st trial on my "sketchup" works ...
demmit !!!!!!
i'm a genius ... am i ???
downloaded the sketchup ..
go thru the intro video at once..
spent 2hrs+ ..
and i'm DONE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
demmit !!!!!!
i'm a genius ... am i ???
downloaded the sketchup ..
go thru the intro video at once..
spent 2hrs+ ..
and i'm DONE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
AWESOME !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i got my own 3D works ...
don't play play ... do you ???
==''
never judge moi book by moi covers peeps !!!!
*blessssing*
step to steps ... i'm in JOY !!!!!!!!!!!
*nervous & exciting too*
Thursday, November 18, 2010
~* Fear kills everything ... *~
Fear kills everything ..
your mind , your heart , your imagination
- via Cornelia Funke-
your mind , your heart , your imagination
- via Cornelia Funke-
Definitely it is ..
Glad i'm over ..
my mind is fulled of lotsa imaginations right now ...
my heart is keep telling my mind,
i'm good,
i'm healthy,
i'm happy..
and so do i'm good !! i'm healthy !!! And i'm HAPPY !!!!!!
i see the light ... do you ???
*happy*
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
~* 1 2 die .. *~
After seeking so many specialist ..
Neurologist for migraine ..
Which after had half pill of the medicine ..
I'd fall in sore-throat continue with fever come and go ... :( and flu afterward ..
*demmit hate it*
Opthalm0logist for the blur eye ...
Doesn't help at all pun as they said had something called floater in my eye which can't take it off via medicine and they got not explain for why the floater is dropping off ..
Fuck !!!! I'd to beBlind Blur for another month???
The appointment cardssss ...
And now ....
I'm still sick AGAIN !!!!!!!!!!!!!
Urghhhhhh !!! FUCK MY LIFE !!!!!!!
I know !!!! Everyone is
when heard of it .. So do I !!!!!!!
Whoever love to fall sick ??? I'll want to stay healthy too !!!! i'm so wish for the healthy tho.
Does anyone know how pain I'm ???
All I heard is take good care .. But how ??? HOW ??? HOW ?? HOW ?????????
Nobody know how I want and how I wish to stay healthy ..I bet for N-O-B-O-D-Y .. !!!!!!
I seriously deeply feel 2 die the moment I saw the pills , and suffer the pain ...
I'm in soooooo much pain which I can't tell anyone tho.
The fever, the flu , the sorethroat and I vomit a lot even I only had white plain bread !!!!
Darn fuck !!!!!!! I want tooooooooooo DIE !!!!!!!!!!!!!! i'm soooo useless to unable to take good care of my self !!!!!!!!!!!! perhaps i'm born to be a sick worm !!!!! demmit !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
really FUCK my life !!!!
p/s:
maybe i really want to die just i don't want to die now yet . =='
maybe i really want to die just when everyone ask me to take k .. but how ???
maybe i just don't want to die and i just want to say i want to die .. CAN ????
- Posted using BlogPress from Genz's iPhone®
Neurologist for migraine ..
Which after had half pill of the medicine ..
I'd fall in sore-throat continue with fever come and go ... :( and flu afterward ..
*demmit hate it*
Opthalm0logist for the blur eye ...
Doesn't help at all pun as they said had something called floater in my eye which can't take it off via medicine and they got not explain for why the floater is dropping off ..
Fuck !!!! I'd to be
The appointment cardssss ...
And now ....
I'm still sick AGAIN !!!!!!!!!!!!!
Urghhhhhh !!! FUCK MY LIFE !!!!!!!
I know !!!! Everyone is
when heard of it .. So do I !!!!!!!Whoever love to fall sick ??? I'll want to stay healthy too !!!! i'm so wish for the healthy tho.
Does anyone know how pain I'm ???
All I heard is take good care .. But how ??? HOW ??? HOW ?? HOW ?????????
Nobody know how I want and how I wish to stay healthy ..I bet for N-O-B-O-D-Y .. !!!!!!
I seriously deeply feel 2 die the moment I saw the pills , and suffer the pain ...
I'm in soooooo much pain which I can't tell anyone tho.
The fever, the flu , the sorethroat and I vomit a lot even I only had white plain bread !!!!
Darn fuck !!!!!!! I want tooooooooooo DIE !!!!!!!!!!!!!! i'm soooo useless to unable to take good care of my self !!!!!!!!!!!! perhaps i'm born to be a sick worm !!!!! demmit !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
really FUCK my life !!!!
p/s:
maybe i really want to die just i don't want to die now yet . =='
maybe i really want to die just when everyone ask me to take k .. but how ???
maybe i just don't want to die and i just want to say i want to die .. CAN ????
- Posted using BlogPress from Genz's iPhone®
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
~* 一莫 *~
"今天你好吗? "
"嗯.... "
"好.... "
"为何好??? "
"因为... 还活着... "
"不好... "
"为何不好..???"
"因为... 不知为何还活着.. "
"不是的酱的．．．"
"人是因为活着而精彩.. 还是精彩的活着... ???"
"目标呢?? "
"理想呢?? "
"行动呢?? "
"病．．．"
"借口．．"
"懒．．．"
"理由．．．"
"想动．．．"
"痛．．．"
"累．．．"
．．．．．． 乱 ．．．．．．．．
"正能量．．．正能量．．．"
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
~*FRESH AIR *~
Recall it back ..
08102010
I was giving some nostril drop , spray and this mentol thingy to smell in the ward to clear my nostrils .
I thought I'm getting better and I even thought of leaving the ward and sleep at home that night.
Dad,Sis & SIL came over to visit, I was still alright , then friends pay another visit. Before they leave,I felt so bad that I think my bloooody nose had shocked them.
*guilty*
The bloody nose keep bleeding for the 2nd time while we happily chit-chating.I felt some liquid is dropping thru my throat again.I asked for tissue and I split and it showed.
I was in real worry in fact but I try not to show how sad and worry I'm when my friends is around as I felt bad to get them worry too but still I felt I'm failed.
Doc showed up ard 11pm and I can't tell how pain it is when the doc put atampon thingy pad in my left nostril try to block the bleeding,he can't sure will it help but stil he had to put the pad in . It's soooo fucking pain till toi and others heard my "scream" while the doc putting it in when they waiting outside the ward.
I grabbed the doc hand and he just "slot" the pad in hardly to my left nostril and spray some salt water to soften the pad to block my bleeding.I screamed and shedding my tear while they wipe off my bloody face.
I felt to cry out loud for the pain but I knew it will caused much more worry for toi and others so I shed off my tears and try to put back a ;) on my face no matter how pain I'm .
They left and I silently pray myself wishing so hard there will have someone to hear me and grant me for a safety night ..
Seem my prayer is not strong enough ..
09102010
2:30am
I felt the bleeding once again from the uber uncomfortable sleep.. I rang the bell and the nurse can't hear me . They moved sovslow while my nose bleeding so fast.
I got them to call doc once again and I knew some of them got shocked to see the bleeding too.This time the blood didn't go thru the throat as the pad had blocked it so it's "flush" out via my nostril I try to grab as much tissues as I can to wipe off the bleeding and I got them to give me the ice while the nurse just stunt to see how scary my bleeding is ..
I can't remember was I crying or was I screaming but seriously i felt so helpless to see the blood on the tissues ..
I saw there is much longer pad they got which they try to block my bleeding nose.I hate to recall that moment .. Doc came and said he had to just block 2 side of my nostrils try to release the tension of the left side see whether will it stop afterward.
He kept say sorry to me as the longer pad cause much more pain. I knew as i screamed out loud and cry out loud the moment he "slot" the pad in on my right nostril. I even grabbed his hand hard refuse to let him do so but then the pain make me weaker and all I can was just crying .
Things never ends, doc pulled out the previous pad from left nostril and replace the longer one while I'm still struggle, crying and stil in pain.I was so helpless again, the nurses just wiping off my tears with blood while I'm still shedding my tears in fear with lotsa pain.
Seem the doc don't have any treatment for me, he suggested he shall transfer me to another hospital for a suitable treatment to stop the bleeding, he went on the checking while I'm siting alone in the ward with some ice-cube which the only hope I had that it'll stop the bleeding tho.
I keep praying myself hoping time pass fast, hoping day come fast so that I can call up toi or dad for some help or mayb some support as I really so helpless.
But my prayer are so weak I'm sure . Doc told me that he found a treatment and doc which suitable for my bleeding nose and without any hesitate I just nod & pray that this will really help.
They called and arranged for the ambulance transfer while I being transferred to icu @ 3am+ in the early morning to wait.
I sms'ed toi to come ovr for some transfer procedure. I was so sick and pain but I told him not to worry that I'm alright.( He told me he got shocked the time he saw me in the icu afterward as my nose was swelling cause of the 2 pads in my nostrils.) he is succeed to prevent he is alright to see me that moment just like I tried to put a : ) on my face when I saw him.
I felt released to have him there.He came to me rubbed my head and gave me a hug and hand it do really gave me lotsa hope I must said.
Time passed slow still while the procedures done and transferred to another hospital.
5am+ I was in EA bangsar pantai .I been transferred to another icu with lotsa plug on me while wait for doc .. I felt so calm while they "works" on me, perhaps I'm tired, real tired.
They said doc will be there for me when the day come .As time passed I felt the both pad in my nostrils fulled of blood as it's block my throat which caused my chest pain and I hardly to breathe. The throat getting dry and pain as the previous blood I "drank" is dried and full.
After I being cleaned they let Toi to see me.. He came over to give me a hand again and i felt safe. We both tried to be calm which I knew he is so much worry to see me with so many plug and swelling on my face.
*seriously i got shocked to see this swelling nose afterward*
He left and I'm being alone in icu again.
I prayed so hard myself.
I prayed I'll get over the surgery asap.
I prayed I'll get healthier.
I prayed my angels do really heard me.
And I guess they did. They told I'm going for a surgery called "angel-gram" the moment the doc walk in I felt ALRIGHT !!! That's my " angel " came and I knew I'm gonna be alright. ( but which Angiogram is the actual name of the surgery tho.. Darn failed of moi !!!)
After all the story telling, diagnose, surgery procedures explained and paper signed. It's officially I'm gonna be sent in operation room for the bloody nose afterward.
They unplugged me from the ICU room all the way to the so-called "angel" room I just felt CALM. Seriously CALM .
That was my first time in a surgery room. Moi sis told before that it's so scared while in an operation room but its just alright for me.Perhaps I'm much more worry when I see the bloody nose.
The "angel" room was really cold and its pack with lotsa nurse , doc, equipment and lots of computer screen . The room ain't as silence as what we see in TVB drama which we think it should be or maybe my case was abit in rush and sudden hence they sent me in still while wait for the ENT doc come that's why Lots of ppls talking in the room which makes it's not as scary as what I think it should be. Lots of question asked which I can't remember afterward. I just felt they talked about me , discuss about me and putting really another batch lotssss of plug on me.
Then the anesthesiologist came last and he gave me an injection and put me an oxygen mask then ..... i'mgone ZzzZZzzZZZzZZZzZZZz .....
..................... N hours later ......................
"Girl .. girl ... Girl .. hello girl ..." *pat pat*
I heard someone calling me ..
someoneslapping patting on me.
i heard them but i can't move ..
they patted on me even harder.
i tried to move my finger to show i heard them.
But they keep "slapping" me and keep calling me ...
i tried to open my eyes and i did open for 1sec maybe ??
i heard lots of nurse & doc are talking again ..
i guess i was safe & back in the "angelroom" !!
i felt dizzy ..
Someone pressing my leg ..
Someone moving me ..
Someone sealed my wound ..
Someone put me an oxygen mask ..
Someone moved me aside ..
i KNEW .. i'm ALIVE !!!!!
i felt to cry ... but i'm so weak.
i felt hard to breathe and i'm choking follow with a vomit.
Someone cleaned me ..
i told them i can't breathe with a very weak voice ..
Someone put back the mask on me..
Someone talked to me ..
Someone asked me to breathe via my mouth..
i told them i'm cold ...
with my eyes close ...
i can't even open my eyes ...
Someone gave me another blanket to make me warmer...
i told them my throat is in serious pain ..
Someone answered me ..
it's alright girl .. you are safe ...
i asked what the times is now ??
Someone told me its 12:35pm ..
OMG !!!!! i been in the "angelroom" for more than 3 & half hours ..
i'm sure Toi & others must be worry on me ..
Someone moved me to somewhere else ...
I opened my eyes so hard for another 2 secs ..
i was in ICU room..
i heard ENT doc came in to check on me ..
it's TOI !!!!
i think i : ) ... but with the mask on i don't think they see it ..
or maybe i'm too weak to show a : ) on but i remember i was : )
the moment i saw Toi ...
i tried so many times to open my eyes ... just to have a look on him to show i'm safe ...
Then i guess he did came over and gave me another hand .. i felt super CALM and SAFE ..
i told Doc my throat is really in pain .. And doc explained which i forgot now.
I think doc told Toi i'm safe but i'll sleeping still and asked him to come over afterward.
i think Toi rubbed my head , gave me a kiss before he leave..
i assumed so .. which my memory is getting worst for that .. =='
i knew i keep fall in sleep for that moment ..
i opened my eyes ..
then i fall in sleep ...
i opened my eyes again ..
and i fall in sleep again ..
Hours ago, i heard someone ... i tried to open my eyes for few times again and i saw dad .. still i felt tired and dad show me a sign not to talk and continue to sleep.
Then i slept for don't know how long .. i'm awake when nurse gave me some water for my serious sore throat . Then i drank and i vomit again ... then nurse gave me some ice cream with ice water .. i'd it just to freeze my throat . And i fall in sleep again after and i heard dad again ..
He tah-pao'ed "hot stuff" for me which scared the nurse (as i can't have any hot food yet ) and it's became Toi's dinner afterward. =.="
Then Toi came before dad leaved.
And i'm here .. ALIVE !!!! ... This is the way i show i'm : ) as i can't open my mouth .. =='
i'm still in the ICU room till 10/10/10 noon .
10/10/10 8am
This "Cold" fish porridge is the 1st meal of moi since 08/09/2010 . (which my last meal is on 6pm 08/09/2010)
Say bye bye to this thingy ...
And this too .. it's awfully pain ... T.T
Here is the wound of my nose while there is still something inside to protect the wound inside.
11/10/10 8am
This is my breakie before i discharged . Which i can swallow only one plain roti so hard ... =='' darn hard ..
Here's my doc .. my "Angels" ... even they charged really lots on bill . =.="
i remembered my prayer to get back moi FRESH AIR.
i'm trying so hard to be half vegan now as my family's member is all "meat-lovers" hence it's so hard if i want to be a full vegetarian. Anyhow , i agreed with never say NO to any food/vege/meats but as for my prayer i at least have to try to say no to meats (with legs) for a while . That's my promises.
I think i'm quite success, at least since i discharged and its been 10days i didn't had any meats besides some fish . But i just had very little vege also as my mum really cooked very lil vege tho. and they kept poisoned pursue me at least to have lil of meats . my family's member just love me and feed me with meats LOVE !!!!
Be healthy and stay alert peeps.
Thanks for anyone who concerned and cares.
Posted using BlogPress from Genz's iPhone® 11/10/2010 - 20/10/2010
08102010
I was giving some nostril drop , spray and this mentol thingy to smell in the ward to clear my nostrils .
I thought I'm getting better and I even thought of leaving the ward and sleep at home that night.
Dad,Sis & SIL came over to visit, I was still alright , then friends pay another visit. Before they leave,I felt so bad that I think my bloooody nose had shocked them.
*guilty*The bloody nose keep bleeding for the 2nd time while we happily chit-chating.I felt some liquid is dropping thru my throat again.I asked for tissue and I split and it showed.
I was in real worry in fact but I try not to show how sad and worry I'm when my friends is around as I felt bad to get them worry too but still I felt I'm failed.
Doc showed up ard 11pm and I can't tell how pain it is when the doc put a
I grabbed the doc hand and he just "slot" the pad in hardly to my left nostril and spray some salt water to soften the pad to block my bleeding.I screamed and shedding my tear while they wipe off my bloody face.
I felt to cry out loud for the pain but I knew it will caused much more worry for toi and others so I shed off my tears and try to put back a ;) on my face no matter how pain I'm .
They left and I silently pray myself wishing so hard there will have someone to hear me and grant me for a safety night ..
Seem my prayer is not strong enough ..
09102010
2:30am
I felt the bleeding once again from the uber uncomfortable sleep.. I rang the bell and the nurse can't hear me . They moved sovslow while my nose bleeding so fast.
I got them to call doc once again and I knew some of them got shocked to see the bleeding too.This time the blood didn't go thru the throat as the pad had blocked it so it's "flush" out via my nostril I try to grab as much tissues as I can to wipe off the bleeding and I got them to give me the ice while the nurse just stunt to see how scary my bleeding is ..
I can't remember was I crying or was I screaming but seriously i felt so helpless to see the blood on the tissues ..
I saw there is much longer pad they got which they try to block my bleeding nose.I hate to recall that moment .. Doc came and said he had to just block 2 side of my nostrils try to release the tension of the left side see whether will it stop afterward.
He kept say sorry to me as the longer pad cause much more pain. I knew as i screamed out loud and cry out loud the moment he "slot" the pad in on my right nostril. I even grabbed his hand hard refuse to let him do so but then the pain make me weaker and all I can was just crying .
Things never ends, doc pulled out the previous pad from left nostril and replace the longer one while I'm still struggle, crying and stil in pain.I was so helpless again, the nurses just wiping off my tears with blood while I'm still shedding my tears in fear with lotsa pain.
Seem the doc don't have any treatment for me, he suggested he shall transfer me to another hospital for a suitable treatment to stop the bleeding, he went on the checking while I'm siting alone in the ward with some ice-cube which the only hope I had that it'll stop the bleeding tho.
I keep praying myself hoping time pass fast, hoping day come fast so that I can call up toi or dad for some help or mayb some support as I really so helpless.
But my prayer are so weak I'm sure . Doc told me that he found a treatment and doc which suitable for my bleeding nose and without any hesitate I just nod & pray that this will really help.
They called and arranged for the ambulance transfer while I being transferred to icu @ 3am+ in the early morning to wait.
I sms'ed toi to come ovr for some transfer procedure. I was so sick and pain but I told him not to worry that I'm alright.( He told me he got shocked the time he saw me in the icu afterward as my nose was swelling cause of the 2 pads in my nostrils.) he is succeed to prevent he is alright to see me that moment just like I tried to put a : ) on my face when I saw him.
I felt released to have him there.He came to me rubbed my head and gave me a hug and hand it do really gave me lotsa hope I must said.
Time passed slow still while the procedures done and transferred to another hospital.
5am+ I was in EA bangsar pantai .I been transferred to another icu with lotsa plug on me while wait for doc .. I felt so calm while they "works" on me, perhaps I'm tired, real tired.
They said doc will be there for me when the day come .As time passed I felt the both pad in my nostrils fulled of blood as it's block my throat which caused my chest pain and I hardly to breathe. The throat getting dry and pain as the previous blood I "drank" is dried and full.
After I being cleaned they let Toi to see me.. He came over to give me a hand again and i felt safe. We both tried to be calm which I knew he is so much worry to see me with so many plug and swelling on my face.
*seriously i got shocked to see this swelling nose afterward*
I prayed so hard myself.
I prayed I'll get over the surgery asap.
I prayed I'll get healthier.
I prayed my angels do really heard me.
And I guess they did. They told I'm going for a surgery called "angel-gram" the moment the doc walk in I felt ALRIGHT !!! That's my " angel " came and I knew I'm gonna be alright. ( but which Angiogram is the actual name of the surgery tho.. Darn failed of moi !!!)
After all the story telling, diagnose, surgery procedures explained and paper signed. It's officially I'm gonna be sent in operation room for the bloody nose afterward.
They unplugged me from the ICU room all the way to the so-called "angel" room I just felt CALM. Seriously CALM .
That was my first time in a surgery room. Moi sis told before that it's so scared while in an operation room but its just alright for me.Perhaps I'm much more worry when I see the bloody nose.
The "angel" room was really cold and its pack with lotsa nurse , doc, equipment and lots of computer screen . The room ain't as silence as what we see in TVB drama which we think it should be or maybe my case was abit in rush and sudden hence they sent me in still while wait for the ENT doc come that's why Lots of ppls talking in the room which makes it's not as scary as what I think it should be. Lots of question asked which I can't remember afterward. I just felt they talked about me , discuss about me and putting really another batch lotssss of plug on me.
Then the anesthesiologist came last and he gave me an injection and put me an oxygen mask then ..... i'm
..................... N hours later ......................
"Girl .. girl ... Girl .. hello girl ..." *pat pat*
I heard someone calling me ..
someone
i heard them but i can't move ..
they patted on me even harder.
i tried to move my finger to show i heard them.
But they keep "slapping" me and keep calling me ...
i tried to open my eyes and i did open for 1sec maybe ??
i heard lots of nurse & doc are talking again ..
i guess i was safe & back in the "angelroom" !!
i felt dizzy ..
Someone pressing my leg ..
Someone moving me ..
Someone sealed my wound ..
Someone put me an oxygen mask ..
Someone moved me aside ..
i KNEW .. i'm ALIVE !!!!!
i felt to cry ... but i'm so weak.
i felt hard to breathe and i'm choking follow with a vomit.
Someone cleaned me ..
i told them i can't breathe with a very weak voice ..
Someone put back the mask on me..
Someone talked to me ..
Someone asked me to breathe via my mouth..
i told them i'm cold ...
with my eyes close ...
i can't even open my eyes ...
Someone gave me another blanket to make me warmer...
i told them my throat is in serious pain ..
Someone answered me ..
it's alright girl .. you are safe ...
i asked what the times is now ??
Someone told me its 12:35pm ..
OMG !!!!! i been in the "angelroom" for more than 3 & half hours ..
i'm sure Toi & others must be worry on me ..
Someone moved me to somewhere else ...
I opened my eyes so hard for another 2 secs ..
i was in ICU room..
*i just felt to T.T each time i saw this ..i'm sure TOi is much more sad to see this *
i heard ENT doc came in to check on me ..
it's TOI !!!!
i think i : ) ... but with the mask on i don't think they see it ..
or maybe i'm too weak to show a : ) on but i remember i was : )
the moment i saw Toi ...
i tried so many times to open my eyes ... just to have a look on him to show i'm safe ...
Then i guess he did came over and gave me another hand .. i felt super CALM and SAFE ..
i told Doc my throat is really in pain .. And doc explained which i forgot now.
I think doc told Toi i'm safe but i'll sleeping still and asked him to come over afterward.
i think Toi rubbed my head , gave me a kiss before he leave..
i assumed so .. which my memory is getting worst for that .. =='
i knew i keep fall in sleep for that moment ..
i opened my eyes ..
then i fall in sleep ...
i opened my eyes again ..
and i fall in sleep again ..
Hours ago, i heard someone ... i tried to open my eyes for few times again and i saw dad .. still i felt tired and dad show me a sign not to talk and continue to sleep.
Then i slept for don't know how long .. i'm awake when nurse gave me some water for my serious sore throat . Then i drank and i vomit again ... then nurse gave me some ice cream with ice water .. i'd it just to freeze my throat . And i fall in sleep again after and i heard dad again ..
He tah-pao'ed "hot stuff" for me which scared the nurse (as i can't have any hot food yet ) and it's became Toi's dinner afterward. =.="
Then Toi came before dad leaved.
And i'm here .. ALIVE !!!! ... This is the way i show i'm : ) as i can't open my mouth .. =='
i'm still in the ICU room till 10/10/10 noon .
10/10/10 8am
This "Cold" fish porridge is the 1st meal of moi since 08/09/2010 . (which my last meal is on 6pm 08/09/2010)
Say bye bye to this thingy ...
And this too .. it's awfully pain ... T.T
Here is the wound of my nose while there is still something inside to protect the wound inside.
11/10/10 8am
This is my breakie before i discharged . Which i can swallow only one plain roti so hard ... =='' darn hard ..
Here's my doc .. my "Angels" ... even they charged really lots on bill . =.="
i remembered my prayer to get back moi FRESH AIR.
i'm trying so hard to be half vegan now as my family's member is all "meat-lovers" hence it's so hard if i want to be a full vegetarian. Anyhow , i agreed with never say NO to any food/vege/meats but as for my prayer i at least have to try to say no to meats (with legs) for a while . That's my promises.
I think i'm quite success, at least since i discharged and its been 10days i didn't had any meats besides some fish . But i just had very little vege also as my mum really cooked very lil vege tho. and they kept
Be healthy and stay alert peeps.
Thanks for anyone who concerned and cares.
Posted using BlogPress from Genz's iPhone® 11/10/2010 - 20/10/2010
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